The End

by Josh Belville

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02:55

about

This is my last album! It's pretty lo-fi. If you buy it, you'll get a couple bonus tracks. I hope you enjoy it, and thanks for listening to my music.

credits

released January 1, 2014

Josh Belville - errything
Drums courtesy of Hydrogen! It's a great drum tracking program, go download it now! (just google it ya dingus)

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about

Josh Belville Portland

Actor/musician living in Portland, OR.

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Track Name: Talking to You
i never felt so far away
i never felt so far away
talking to you
talking to you
i tried to give my heart away
i tried to give my heart away
talking to you
talking to you

and now i'm a mess
with a heart that's filled
with loneliness
and now i see you
everywhere i go

on all these days i walk alone
on all these days i walk alone
talking to you
talking to you
you should've thrown this dog a bone
you should've thrown this dog a bone
talking to you
talking to you

cause now it's a sin
all the envy that i'm wading in
and now i complain
about everything that's in my brain
and now i see you
every compass point i'm walking to
and now when i sleep
it's a struggle just to count the sheep
and now...
and now...
Track Name: I Took a Break
i ran away
when it wasn't my time
i took a break
when it wasn't my time
and now i'm running
i'm crawling
i'm flying
back to you baby
just as fast as i can

i called your name
when it wasn't my time
i tried to fight
when it wasn't my time
and now i'm running
i'm crawling
i'm flying
back to you baby
just as fast as i can

don't you worry
i got you baby
i'm running
all over the world
never stopping
unless i'm dropping
just to get back
to my girl
Track Name: Refrigerator
two weeks worth of rotten fish
a tupperware full of salad
if i don't get these out of here
i will contract some sort of malady

the first thing after leaving
is to throw away all of your shit
in the fridgerator

seven years of boca burgers
a thousand trips to trader joe's
some kind of tofu mistake
it all has to go

chorus

i just want some room in my refridgerator!

i have got a hankering
for some kind of sheep shank
or indescribable meat product
ooh it makes my mouth all watery
i'll wash it down with hefeweisen--
i know you hate hefeweisen--
and when i'm done i'll clear the fridge
of every last healthy vestige of you!

chorus x2 w/coda
Track Name: Jamie, Why Did We Ever Part?
every day at work i think about your arms
and the tiny hairs that tickle at my skin
of the bruises in a line along your shins
and the scream on the stairs that caused alarm

on the train back home i wonder if you're there
shooting arrows at the target in the backyard
you once said to me that archery is hard
but you tend to make that arrow go anywhere

i proclaim that you have shot me in the heart
and you're more worried about the loss of blood
oh jamie, why did ever we part?

in the window are the drawings we both made
two stick figures holding sticky hands
and by the shoebox full of rubber bands
are our priceless picures saved in rubbermaids

i keep your best perfume beside my bed
when i sleep i smell you running through my head
please believe me when i say
our lives have gone a bit astray
but i hope you'll be my lover in the end

i proclaim that you have shot me in the heart
and you're still worried about the loss of blood
oh jamie, why did ever we part?

we've got a history that's full of random casualties
but i can't seem to separate the love i have for you
with all the broken plates and every miserable date
oh jamie, jamie what do i have to do to forget you?

every night at home i watch tv alone
desperate housewives doesn't seem that funny now
and i hope you're watching too, and wond'ring how
you could watch a show so vain and overblown

i proclaim that you have shot me in the heart
but now i know how to pull the arrow out
oh jamie, why did ever we part?
Track Name: Punch Out Love
i am tethered to your arm once again
you make the blood beat fast in my brain
getting dizzy from adrenaline
my heart can't keep up with the strain

of you next to me
it's like radioactivity

oh i see stars when i see you
like being punched out by sugar ray leonard
a waltz in three-four time will do
but i'm feeling quite a rock beat in my chest

the days feel like spring all the time
even in minus twenty-nine
looking at you is like looking at sunlight
and when you smile it feels so bright

and warm, like maui!
it's like radioactivity

oh i feel sick when i'm with you
i drank too much love potion number nine
if i am rubber and you are glue
then baby i'll stick to you

i'll rope in the moon for you
just like jim stewart did
it's a wonderful life
cause it is when i'm with you

chorus 1
chorus 2
chorus 1 x2
Track Name: Solipsizing
we took our last trip home
we took our last trip home
and i was dizzy from the sun
on the floor that night
on the floor that night
i saw a vision and i began to run

i saw the pieces
i saw the pieces
of our lives all on the ground
i tried to pick them up
i tried to pick them up
but they kept falling down

you're in the bathroom crying
i'm on the floor solipsizing

and when your mother calls
and when your mother calls
tell her i'm not there
i put gas in the car
i put gas in the car
and i don't even care
how much it costs

you're in the bathroom crying
i'm on the floor solipsizing

i found a new way out
i found a new way out
and i didn't need the drugs
you keep the percoset
you keep the percoset
cause i'm having more fun without it

you're in the bathroom crying
i'm on the floor solipsizing
Track Name: PDX, Call Me Home
spending all my evenings at the bar
i don't even own a car
i walk everywhere
and all these buildings tower over me
as high as i can see
do i miss the big sky?

oh, pdx, call me home
i am wandering through your streets
and i can't help feeling all alone

everyone is looking just the same
the peacoat is to blame
bundled up for winter
i am waiting for my time to come
when i can feel the sun
and whisper no more secrets

oh, pdx, call me home
i am wandering through your streets
and i can't help feeling all alone

i have tried so hard
to be so independent
i've got no one talk to
but you
and you're so far away
from me
Track Name: Oregon Organs
portland when i wake up in the morning
i say a little prayer
i usually do it in my underwear
to a possibly existent god
i ask for health and care
and then i shave off all
the right side of my hair

baby when i come home after work
i try to find you with telepathy
sometimes i forget your name is bethany
and so into the minds of all
i shout "hey girl i seem to know!
hey girl i made out with
after the viva voce show"

i want you in my arms
as we walk down to the coop store
to buy some eggs from top
organic farms
no cause for alarm
be you vegan, or freegan
or just another bundle of organs
oregon organs

baby when i take you out to dinner
we first stand in a line
everyone goes everywhere all the time
in a rain we call a sprinkle
as we wait for seats assigned
i wonder if my credit card
will be declined

portland i am lost within your bookstores
your faithful stapled zines
and all the coffeeshops and breweries inbetween
even the faux eyeglass'd hipsters
in their ever-skinny jeans
can't stop the tumbling of love
that i am feeeeeling

i want you on my lawn
like a queen set out to demonstrate
a victory to all her willing pawns
still you must be calm
be you christian, or fishmen
or just another bundle of organs
oregon organs

lately i've been finding myself waning
and waxing when i can
and gibbering when such attitudes are in demand
and when i'm blue i pull the seashore
from virginia to japan
i pull it up like blankets with my moony hands

then i find your shape in my mind
arrange the blankets thus
sometimes when it's dark it's like the two of us
like ursa major i'm the big spoon
you never make a fuss
in silence i can make out your voice -- just

i want you by my side
while the hippies
flaunt their canisters
of doctored weed
and hemp shirts tied and dyed
hang on for the ride
lest we crash and the streets
are littered with all of our organs
oregon organs
Track Name: Everybody Knows
this is the start of the conversation
that tore us apart
and i can see your hands on the wheel like so
red knuckles heart beating overflow
if we're gonna stop on the side of the street
there better be the promise of body heat
skin touching skin and nose to nose
everybody knows

i can't relate to the indecision
you often create
it seems there is a world that you're making up
your future's in the bottom of a tea-filled cup
can't you see the clouds are a symbol too?
so's the gum on the bottom of your shoe
i tried to speak but my mind froze
everybody knows

and i had a melancholy time
pouring through your afternoon shoes
trying to find any hint of any news
but all i found were crumpled up hate letters
your spelling's not much better
than skin from those who decompose
everybody knows

this is the end of the early mornings i had to pretend
to be a better boyfriend and let you sleep
soul-sucking heartbreaking bleating sheep
now i've got the time to just fade away
i can sleep all fucking day
there's no comparing cons and pros
everybody knows
Track Name: Vino
that bottle of wine from 1969
i broke it all against the wall
and oh it felt so fine

now i got these tannin stains
that look like someone got their
brains smashed in

these souvenirs from paris just last year
they went out with the garbage
along with all my tears

a summer spent in misery
i should've hopped out of that tree
when i had the chance

i was in a trance! i was attracted
to refracted light and not the simple
posture of your stance where was the romance

that antique chair
that you bought on a dare
it's kindle for my fireplace
and you don't even care

it smells like lavender, i swear
the burning of your antique chair

and all your dreams distant but once agleam
are now evaporating like quickly rising steam

a summer spent in misery
i should've hopped out of that tree
when i had the chance

i was in a trance! i was attracted
to refracted light and not the simple
posture of your stance where was the romance