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Kittens & Puppies

by Josh Belville

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1.
should I up and walk away? think about a better part of my day or should I open up to you? with all the words you misconstrue should I order out for food would you like Chinese or maybe fondue or is it time for some leftovers our dessert is Russell Stover's and when I look into your eyes I see that you don't really care for me is it time for us to talk? cause if so I think I'll take a walk and let you cool down until your done because your angry voice is no fun and when I look into your eyes I see that you don't really care for me I'm doing all that I can to make me into your perfect man but I'm so tired of all the fighting the back and forth's not so exciting and when I look into your eyes I see you're searching for what I'm supposed to be and since you’re so upset should I just leave? cause you don't really care for me
2.
I took a stroll around the block one morning thick with all the raining I didn't think with all my luck one missing bike I would be gaining I saw a hobo riding by on one familiar looking schwinn "o what a lovely bike," said I that's when I noticed it was steven's and I chased after that hobo shouting halting words with gusto I politely asked him where he got that bastard bike he responded curtly with a right hook to my left eye here I found your stupid bike steven now you can stop calling here I found your stupid bike with a homeless man I'm brawling I took a roundhouse to the face I didn't know he knew karate this really wasn't my place as my only defense was pilates I almost turned away and ran but I knew I should stand my ground this bum with moves out of japan was blocking me from what I found and so I battled with that hobo using moves I learned from my uncle we were so fatigued that we both collapsed on the grass I would've fallen asleep right there but I was too busy laughing my ass off here I found your stupid bike steven now you can stop calling here I found your stupid bike with a homeless man I'm brawling here I found your stupid bike he gave it to me free of charge here I found your stupid bike now it's no longer at large
3.
tony gazed at cacti staring back at him with prickles baring souls so soft and jellylike, he didn't know if he should fight the dehydration overtaking, or if instead he should partake in sickly juices in the green of cacti's prickly little leaves the stories told of water stored and found by those who holes had bored into the plant's leathery flesh a fiberistic icky mesh he took a chance, removed the spines and cracked the plant to look inside and what he found made him feel ill, he saw inside was filled with jelly he was far from home in the desert alone the ground was quite a mottled red the martian landscape was his bed and although he could breathe out here he found that there was no one near no martian, man, or humanoid no anything to fill the void just him and his soliloquies and silent longing for a breeze or maybe an oasis proper palm trees and a spring of water "there's no palm trees in arizona" he thought, and he was right you know ... ah he was far from home in the desert alone and he saw in the distance his beautiful girlfriend holding a glass of lemonade when he came up to her she was just a mirage he was far from home in the desert alone tony strove beyond his limit won't be taken for a dimwit mirages happen all the time especially ones with lemon-lime his girlfriend was a prickly pear of this he was quickly aware when puckered lips kissed killer spines again, this happens all the time and as the night crept over shoulders made the landscape so much colder fighting off the freezing chill he crawled over a barren hill and tony, who could go no more had found what he was looking for he leapt and said, "oh lordy lordy there's interstate number 40!" he was far from home in the desert alone
4.
Lady Bell 03:18
oh lady bell oh lady bell when you gonna give me the hard sell oh doncha know lady bell i love you do oh lady bell oh lady bell i'm fallin' so hard for you can't you tell oh doncha know lady bell i love you so when you wrap those arms around me i get all jittery and i can't wait to take you home tonight all the boys are lined up behind ya but i'll take them out with a windup no i'm not afraid to fight for my love with a push and a shove
5.
i just wanna fall into a hole fall deeper than anyone else would go i just wanna fall and fall don't wanna see nothing at all i just wanna fall into a hole i just wanna smack your pretty face institute your gruesome fall from grace i just wanna smack away til you can't see the light of day i just wanna smack your pretty face everyone’s been botherin’ me past the point where i can see the benefit of your argument of course i wouldn’t do what i’ve been saying but that doesn’t mean i’m not replaying it twenty times in my head twenty times in my head i don't wanna be part of myself wanna be part of something else don't wanna see my skin and bones show me something that ain't been shown i don't wanna be part of myself i wanna take some time off for a while throw myself into a great big pile of blankets round my comfy bed and i won't wake up til i'm dead i wanna take some time off for a while
6.
and if you want to stay, you can stay and if you want to go, there's the door and if you want to snuggle tight, here's my arms, i'm wide open lay our bodies to the floor and the first thing is, i never lied and the second thing is and the third thing is, i always tried to keep you safe, to keep you sound to keep your feet on the ground
7.
SMB Interlude (free) 01:01
8.
babe I love you babe I love you and I don't want you go felt that we were strong loved for so very long baby I just don't want you to go babe I love you babe I love you I don't wanna see you cry the tears are brimming wide I feel a pain right in my side baby I don't wanna see you cry I hope that you will find a better man to treat you kind worthy feet to fill my shoes I'll kiss you goodbye but you know that I won't cry cause in the end you’re the one who loses
9.
if I had a nickel for every time a woman walked by who was really fine well I'd have a hundred dollars or so but I wouldn't have a girl to take home if I had a dollar for every drink I bought for a girl cause she looked pretty in pink well I'd have a house on lake Tahoe but I wouldn't have a girl to take home all I wanna do is make sweet love to you but you don't even know my name I tried to call your home but no one got the phone I guess that I'm the one to blame if I had a sandwich for every gal who had her arms around some other pal well I'd have a meal fit for a man on a throne but I wouldn't have a girl to take home
10.
tell the kids the fire's burning and we'll roast marshmallows in the heap of dying embers is where we'll dry our toes oh the house where we spent our lives slowly crumbles into ash and while we watch we secret high fives for from the smoulder comes the cash forget about the dog, he was too old anyway he will be remembered forget about the things that made you so unique they were all built in taiwan forget about the lawn the day we burned our house down was the best day of our lives the day we burned our house down and we didn't even try to contain it i can't explain it we all wanted it to burn it lit up the town the day we burned our house down and we sat among the evergreens awaiting our direction, awaiting our direction and i kissed you by the fireside in the moonlight prechorus chorus
11.
that horse'll never ride again, said old petey that horse'll never ride again, you'll see but i showed him, yes i showed him i took him to the vet for orthoscopic surgery i took him to the stables for therapy and i showed him, yes i showed him old petey didn't trust me til i took that horse out for a ride i was so annoyed with him i took that horse out on a whim and rode that bastard till he dropped and died that horse'll never ride again, said old petey that horse'll never ride again, you'll see but i showed him, yes i showed him
12.
ohhh! when I was a lad all I thoughts that I had were how I would become a great actor so I took me some classes but my teachers were asses figured school wasn't such a big factor so I went show to show with my headshot in tow and a light little step in my shoe and with each role I got in this notebook I thought of all the great things I would do I'm gonna buy me a solid gold car Oh boy I'm gonna go far And I'm gonna play my guitar in the hallway all I want to I'm gonna live me a life of ease All my vices I'm gonna appease I've got all the expertise yes it's the life for me when I'm equity now this is my directive not to be so introspective when in doubt I should consider myself lucky with this brazen charm of mine I'm sure I'll do just fine in fact I think directors find me plucky but when faced with such a luxury I find I'm quite unusually afraid of what I'll do when I'm on stage and when times like these arise I find I must reprise my notebook, so I'll simply turn the page I'm gonna eat me a seven course meal steep myself in sex appeal I'll negotiate a six-figure deal and I'll do it with a smile I'm gonna buy me a forty foot yacht then return all the things that I bought go out and buy a hundred more yes it's the life for me when I'm equity and just so you know all you people down below can expect a thank you card when I'm a star so just you wait and see for the star I’m going to be until then, stay where you are all together now! I'm gonna buy me a solid gold car (a convertible!) Oh boy I'm gonna go far (inconceivable!) And I'm gonna play my guitar in the hallway all I want to (ditty) I'm gonna live me a life of ease (where’s my irish cream?) All my vices I'm gonna appease (mostly gambling) I've got all the expertise yes it's the life for me when I'm ... [key change] I'm gonna eat me a seven course meal [try the lobster bisque] steep myself in sex appeal [now that’s a bit of a risk] negotiate a six-figure deal and I'll do it with a smile [sign on the dotted line] buy me a forty foot yacht [a convertible!] then return all the things that I bought [you’re despicable!] go out and buy a hundred more yes it's the life for me when I'm equity
13.
kittens are super, kittens are great everybody loves kittens, it's not too late to pet their little fur, stroke their little ears get a little misty-eyed and knock back a little beer and tell that little kitten all the bad news of your day hey hey, cause they best thing about kittens is kittens love to listen puppies are lovely, puppies are grand and sometimes little puppies fit in the palm of your hand take 'em with you in a purse, or a little doggie backpack and when you see that guy who fucked your wife tell that puppy to attack cause you trained him to kill not to be a paperweight hey hey, cause the best thing about puppies is puppies love to kill people oh clean up that cat poop

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A labor of love from my parents' basement.

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released August 13, 2006

Josh Belville - vocals, guitar

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Josh Belville Portland

Actor/musician living in Portland, OR.

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